Are we moving towards something fabulous? Or running away from something not-so-hot?
I hope this finds you in good health and enjoying the onset of fall. If you know me, you’ll know I’m unapologetic about my attachment to the long, warm days of summer, and yet I’m grateful for the opportunity to slow down and turn inward that the cooler, shorter days of autumn present.
On a recent road trip to Colorado, Rob snapped this photo of me. While I wish I was smokin’ him on our hike (that’s unlikely to happen), there’s something about this image of me that made me curious. Am I walking away, in retreat? Or am I moving forward, towards something bright and exciting, even if it’s yet unknown?
What about you? Are you moving towards what you want more of in your life?
This is a common theme with my clients. And fall is the perfect time to take a really good look at our health goals.
When we’re working to affect change in our lives, it can be easy to get stuck in the mud of what we don’t want, what we can’t do and what we’ll never have. While we need to know what’s not working to move towards what we do want, it is perhaps more important to keep our eye on the prize.
I am right where I am supposed to be. And I want more for myself!
Great! So let’s experiment. What if, we accept our present state, where we are right now, AND focus on what we want more of in our lives.
Say you would like to lose some of the dreaded COVID bloat and boost your energy. You notice my fall cleanse coming up. Suddenly, the mind gets defensive and makes you the victim: Oh, I’ll have to give up all of the foods I love; I won’t be able to enjoy the holidays. Victimhood often leads to resignation: I’ll never fit into my skinny jeans.
Reframe judgment to curiosity
How could we shift this train of thought? Hmmm...I bet there are some really tasty recipes I haven’t tried; It will be fun to get creative and try new a new family tradition for Thanksgiving—one that won’t wreck my healthy eating plan. Curiosity then turns to optimism: I can see myself now, shakin’ my booty in my skinny jeans!
Habit change super power
My favorite trick to affect and sustain habit change is—instead of focusing on what we don’t want more of, we simply keep crowding the unwanted behavior out with habits that lead us to more of what we do want.
Let’s see this in action. Say you want to reduce bloat, and your partner is making pasta for dinner. However, you know eating a huge serving leaves you feeling overfull and sluggish, but you don't want to hurt your partner’s feelings. Or turn down the pasta! (That’s just running away!)
Accept the present state: Rob made pasta for dinner. (Yum!)
What do I want more of in my life? Feeling good in my body.
What particular habit will help me have more of what I want? In this case, why not start Rob’s pasta with a bowl of butternut squash soup, and add an exciting new vegetable to your plate. Broccoli raab anyone?
When you add in good habits that lead you towards your health goals, like starting your meal with soup and green veggies, you’re less likely to overindulge on the pasta.
Stop retreating and start moving forward in three easy steps:
Get clear on what you want less of.
Get SUPER clear on what you want more of.
Identify what small changes you can make that will lead you where you want to go.
What wild and amazing things are you moving towards?
Not sure how or where to start on your journey? Shaking things up can be challenging and frightening. I’ve got your back.
Here’s to living the life of your wildest dreams,
Lisa